Headlines
Two Senators in One!
- “Feingold on His Tough Re-Election Race: I Blame George Bush!”–headline, NewsBusters.org, Sept. 2
- “Feingold to Miss Obama Labor Day Visit”–headline, Milwaukee Journal Sentinel, Sept. 3
Out on a Limb
- “Dems in Power Could Be in Peril, Poll Says”–headline USA Today, Sept. 3
- “Elections may defeat Obama’s plans”–subheadline, Watertown (N.Y.) Daily Times, Sept. 3
- “Shock Prediction: GOP to Take House, Maybe Senate in 2010 Election”–headline, U.S. News & World Report website, Sept. 2
“People liked the Hope and Change stuff, but he fell short on convincing people he could transmogrify the rhetorical gold into reality. Sure, he won in the end. It was a change election, and he was the ultimate change candidate, with no real record to serve as ballast for all of his hot air.But then came the governing, when the steak needed to outrank the sizzle.”–Jonah Goldberg syndicated column, Sept. 3
Though in Retrospect, We’re Not Sure That Qualified Him to Be President
“Organization Made Possible With Help From Professional Organizers”–headline, Star Press (Muncie, Ind.), Sept. 3
“Obama’s Day: The Economy and a Trip to Camp David”–headline, USA Today website, Sept. 3
‘Advise and Consent’ Comes to the Stage
“The Senate’s in Play”–headline, NationalJournal.com, Sept. 4
“Lawmaker Says Mistakes Used to Distort Her Image”–headline, Associated Press, Sept. 1
Turns Out Sea Levels Are Falling, Not Rising
“Ancient Coral Reef Uncovered in South Pacific”–headline, BBC website, Sept. 1
‘Hey, It’s Still Hotter Than Heck!’
“CONGRESSIONAL DISTRICT 3: Claim Against Heck Resurfaces”–headline, Las Vegas Review-Journal, Sept. 1
Life Imitates ‘South Park’
- “The episode begins with Cartman mocking Wendy’s presentation on breast cancer awareness, making comments such as ‘titty cancer’ and ‘killer titties on the loose.’ ”–Wikipedia.org episode summary, “Breast Cancer Show Ever,” originally aired Oct. 15, 2008
- “ ’I Love Boobies’ Breast Cancer Awareness Bracelets Banned at Schools”–headline, JusticeNewsFlash.com, Sept. 1, 2010
The Lonely Lives of Scientists
- “Scientists Cross With Tick”–headline, ABC News website (Australia), Sept. 3
- “Scientists ‘Listen’ to Paint Pigments”–headline, United Press International, Sept. 2
That Doesn’t Sound Very Thrifty
“Avis Raises Dollar Thrifty Bid to $1.35 Billion”–headline, Bloomberg, Sept. 2
“N.J. Man Assaulted Bottle at Party Following Christening”–headline, Daily Journal (Vineland, N.J.), Sept. 3
Questions Nobody Is Asking
- “What Is the Role of Cadaver Research in the Safety of Your Car?”–headline, Grand Rapids (Mich.) Press, Sept. 1
- “Who Is the Bearded Hippie in the September J. Crew Catalog?”–headline, Slate.com, Sept. 1
- “Why Don’t Black Americans Swim?”–headline, BBC website, Sept. 3
- “Is a Heart Attack Hiding in Your Hair?”–headline, Toronto Star, Sept. 3
- “Are Baby Carrots the New ‘Junk Food’?”–headline, FoxNews.com, Sept. 3
- “Have LDS, Jews Resolved Proxy Baptism Dispute?”–headline, Salt Lake Tribune, Sept. 3
Answers to Questions Nobody Is Asking
- “Why I Blame Ryanair for François the Beach Flasher”–headline, Daily Telegraph (London), Sept. 2
- “Why I Miss Bubba”–headline, New York Post, Sept. 3
Man Bites Peeve–Now That Would Be News
“Man Bites Police Over a Pet Peeve”–headline, Reuters, Sept. 2
“Alcohol Consumption ‘Continues to Fall’ ”–headline, BBC website, Sept. 3
It’s Always in the Last Place You Look
“Peephole Found in Beaver County Courthouse Bathroom”–headline, Associated Press, Sept. 2
“Con Man Bilking Seniors Sought in Vancouver”–headline, CBC.ca, Sept. 2
Everything Seemingly Is Spinning Out of Control
- “Martha Stewart Thinks Nancy Pelosi Is ‘Absolutely Beautiful’ and Wants to Interview Her on New Show”–headline, Daily News (New York), Sept. 2
- “Palin’s New Defenders: Liberal Feminists”–headline, National Review Online, Sept. 2
“Conservative Christian Religious Beliefs, Use of Moderate Corporal Punishment, High Sex Drive, and Interest in Wife’s Private Areas Do Not Show Family Violence”–headline, Volokh.com, Sept. 2
Bottom Stories of the Day
- “URI Ranks 18th in the Nation for Attracting NIH Funding”–headline, Providence Business News, Sept. 1
- “Ashton Kutcher DENIES Cheating on Demi Moore”–headline, Puffington Host, Sept. 2
- “Ahmadinejad Predicts The Removal of ‘Zionists’ From the World”–headline, Daily Telegraph (London), Sept. 3
