Headlines

Posted by dailyslog on 01/03/2011 | Short Link

Quite a Comedown After the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize
“Man Held for Claiming to Be ‘World’s Savior’ ”–headline, Emirates247.com (Dubai), Feb. 27

Life Imitates the Onion–I

  • “If You Put Your Mind to It You Can Believe Anything”–headline, Onion, March 30, 2010
  • “California Driver Still a Believer in Nissan Leaf Electric Car After Two Months on the Road”–headline,FoxNews.com, Feb. 25, 2011

Life Imitates the Onion–II

  • “Guatemalan Earthquake Registers 0.3 on Area Man’s Consciousness”–headline, Onion, June 9, 1999
  • “Salvadoran Earthquake Registers 0.2 on Local Man’s Consciousness”–headline, Onion, Jan. 17, 2001
  • “Three Earthquakes Recorded Near Guy Overnight”–headline, KATV website (Little Rock, Ark.), Feb. 28

What Is the PMRC’s ‘Filthy Fifteen’?

“Gore, Obscenities, and Generally a Good Time”–headline, Spectrum (University of Buffalo), Feb. 28

The German Chancellor Does the Same Thing
“Why Did Burma’s Leader Appear on TV in Women’s Clothes?”–headline, Time.com, Feb. 27

Ein Volk, ein Reich, Zwei Bunga
“Umberto Eco Compares Berlusconi With Hitler”–headline, Daily Telegraph (London), Feb. 26

The Navy Tested Positive for Old Salt
“AF Starts Drug Testing Airmen for Spice”–headline, Stars and Stripes, Feb. 25

The Lonely Lives of Scientists
“First Virgin Civilians in Space: Scientists”–headline, AutoEvolution.com, Feb. 28

What Has Two Tusks, Two Trunks and Two Backs?
“Elephant Has Sex With a Car”–headline, Sun (London), Feb. 26

We Thought Adults Usually Made Children
“Happy Children Make Happy Adults”–headline, University of Cambridge press release, Feb. 26

Brain and Brain, What Is Brain?
“What Will Happen to Former NFL Player’s Brain?”–headline, CNN.com, Feb. 26

It’s a Cookbook
“200 Giant Spiders, Termites Feast on Man”–headline, Daily Telegrpah (Australia), Feb. 26

Here You Go, ‘Paradise Lost’
“Johnson Brings Title Back to Milton”–headline, Gazette (Janesville, Wis.), Feb. 27

‘Sorry, Buddy, We Don’t Allow Fish Byproducts in This Bar’
“Alaska Fish Byproducts Kept From Getting Wasted”–headline, Associated Press, Feb. 25

Questions Nobody Is Asking

  • “Has Anyone Told Ambassador Rice There’s a Crisis in Libya?”–headline, PajamasMedia.com, Feb. 25
  • “Breast Milk Ice Cream, Anyone?”–headline, San Francisco Chronicle website, Feb. 25
  • “Could a Small Nuclear War Reverse Global Warming?”–headline, Puffington Host, Feb. 26

Sensitive Gay Troops to Get Combat Training–Now That Would Be News
“Combat Troops to Get Gay Sensitivity Training”–headline, Washington Times, Feb. 25

Look Out Below!

  • “Fall of Hong Kong’s Gilded Generation”–headline, Daily Telegraph (London), Feb. 28
  • “Penis Graffiti on St Petersburg Bridge Dropped From Russian Art Competition”–headline, Metro.co.uk, Feb. 28
  • “Kathleen Parker Dropped From ‘Parker Spitzer’ ”–headline, Fancast.com, Feb. 25

Too Much Information
“Charlie Sheen: I’ll Keep Doing ‘Men’ ”–headline, TMZ.com, Feb. 28

News You Can Use
“Cats Adore, Manipulate Women”–headline, Discovery.com, Feb. 24

Bottom Stories of the Day

  • “Nation of Islam Convention to Include Talk of UFOs”–headline, Associated Press, Feb. 25
  • “Emanuel Transition Aide Quits After Ethics Violation Revealed”–headline, ChicagoBreakingNews.com, Feb. 26
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