Headlines
No Longer Incontinent on the Continent
“Big Freeze Stops Famed Brussels Statue From Peeing”–headline, Reuters, Feb. 1
Oh, the Irony!
“As I write at the end of the World Economic Forum in Davos, I’m struck by the sense that there is a lot of news this year, but ironically, it wasn’t made in Davos.”–Timothy Shriver, Puffington Host, Jan. 31
Metaphor Alert
“Mitt Romney galloped to victory in Florida, but it was an expensive coup. He took a hit at the bank, outspending his rivals. He also paid a political price. Romney landed a devastatingblow to Gingrich’s candidacy, but the bruise from the fight remains, and it may sting as he scrambles to assert himself as the probable nominee. Conservatives, already skeptical of Romney’s politics, are grumbling about his internecine aggression. Granted, Gingrich is hardly an angel, and simmering discomfort over Romney’s ruthlessness will not derail him. But a growing unease with Romney’s big-dollar blitz may stir sympathy for Gingrich and encourage the former House speaker to carry on with vengeance.”–Robert Costa, National Review Online, Jan. 31
Out on a Limb
- “Analysis: Gingrich Campaign Needs Another Comeback”–headline, Associated Press, Feb. 1
- “Mitt Romney: Obama Will Be ‘Vitriolic, Spiteful’”–headline, Politico.com, Feb. 1
We Blame Global Warming
“The Fat Lady Hasn’t Sung, But She’s Warming Up”–headline, RedState.com, Jan. 31
Burn, Baby, Burn
“In Florida, Diverse Young Republicans Ignited By Ron Paul”–headline, Puffington Host, Jan. 31
Because if They Didn’t, They’d Just Be Saurs
“Rethinking Why Dinosaurs Got So Big”–headline, CosmosMagazine.com, Feb. 1
The Lonely Lives of Scientists
- “Scientists intrigued by atoms from beyond the solar system”–headline, Christian Science Monitor, Jan. 31
- “Neuroscientists Make Headway Turning Thoughts Into Speech”–headline, USA Today, Feb. 1
At Their Age, They Probably Don’t Need Birth Control Anyway
“No. 21 Cougars Outlast Trojans in Overtime”–headline, Taylor University website, Feb. 1
All She Needs Is Water and a Whole Lot of Refined Sugar
“Paula Deen Should Turn Lemons Into Lemonade”–headline, Puffington Host, Feb. 1
Hey, Kids! What Time Is It?
“Winter Is the Time for Rich, Full-Bodied Wine”–headline, San Diego Union-Tribune, Feb. 1
Questions Nobody Is Asking
- “Wipes: What, Where, Why & How? “–headline, Nonwovens Industry, January issue
- “Is the Super Bowl Socialist?”–headline, Puffington Host, Jan. 31
- “Will the crazy-nasty GOP attacks on Obama provoke a voter backlash to defend the flawed but human Democrat?”–subheadline, Salon.com, Jan. 31
Answers to Questions Nobody Is Asking
“The Uncanny Valley: What Robot Theory Tells Us About Mitt Romney”–headline, TheAtlantic.com, Jan. 31
It’s Always in the Last Place You Look
- “Asian-Americans Missing From Broadway, Study Finds”–headline, Crain’s New York Business, Jan. 31
- “Huffington Post [sic] Quebec Loses High-Profile Contributors”–headline, Montreal Gazette, Feb. 1
Someone Set Up Us the Bomb
“Twitter Feed White Girl Problems Becomes a Book: Authors on Babe Walker”–headline, TheDailyBeast.com, Jan. 31
News of the Tautological
“Toothless Pa. Bank Robber Suspect Needed Dentures”–headline, Associated Press, Feb. 1
Breaking News From 2013
“Feb. 1, 1885: Mormon President Goes Underground”–headline, History Channel website, Feb. 1
News You Can Use
“Living in an Elitist Bubble Doesn’t Mean You Can’t Relate to the Rest of America”–headline, CafeMom.com, Jan. 30
Bottom Stories of the Day
- “Global Warming Seen as Threat to NJ’s Cranberry Farms”–headline, PerishableNews.com, Jan. 31
- “Obama Green Jobs Program Faces Further Investigation”–headline, USA Today, Jan. 31
