Posted by dailyslog on 02/03/2012 in Headlines | Short Link

Michelle Obama Strikes Again 
“NORTHAMPTON: Man Convicted of Assault, Parental Abduction After Attempted Fast-Food Delivery”–headline, Daily Times (Salisbury, Md.), Feb. 29

Out on a Limb

  • “Chinese Police May Have Power to Disappear People”–headline, Associated Press, March 1
  • “Saudi Arabia May Be Tied to 9/11, 2 Ex-Senators Say”–headline, New York Times, March 1

Life Imitates the Onion

  • “Cost of Living Now Outweighs Benefits”–headline, Onion, April 13, 2005
  • ” ‘Struggling’ on $350,000 a Year”–headline, WSJ.com, Feb. 29, 2012

Ron Paul Made Him Get off His Lawn 
“Obama to Talk Energy in Romney’s Backyard”–headline, Reuters, March 1

But Hope and Change! 

“Is This the Reason Democracy Can’t Work? Study Find [sic] Humans Are Too Dumb to Pick the Right Person to Lead Us”–headline, Daily Mail (London), Feb. 29

‘. . . Tape Wires From Portable Telephones to Human Genitals and Turned Up the Power . . ‘ 
“Kerry in Her Very Own Words”–headline, Afro.com, Feb. 29

Jim McDermott, Centrist? 
“Political Center Shrinks in Congress”–headline, WSJ.com, March 1

Larry Craig’s Got Nothing on These Guys 
“City Council Praised for Watershed Stance”–headline, ThisWeekNews.com (Ohio), Feb. 29

Shortest Books Ever Written 
“How Davy Jones Changed the World”–headline, PJMedia.com, Feb. 29

The Motley Fool 
“Peeing Frenchman Suing Google for Making Him Laughing Stock”–headline, New York Post, March 1

Questions Nobody Is Asking

  • “Will Olympia Snowe’s Departure Wound the GOP?”–headline, Politico.com, March 1
  • “What in Holy Heck Is The McRibster and Why Can’t We Get One Here?”–headline, Consumerist.com, March 1

Answers to Questions Nobody Is Asking 
“Rick Romney? Mitt Santorum? A Recipe for a Better GOP Candidate”–headline, CBSNews.com, March 1

Voter Becomes Dog–Now That Would Be News 
“Albuquerque Dog Becomes Registered Voter”–headline, KOB-TV website, Feb. 29

It’s Always in the Last Place You Look

  • “Giant Jurassic Fleas Found in China”–headline, TheDailyBeast.com, March 1
  • “Professional Wrestler Sues Opponent After Losing Testicle From Match”–headline, WKRK-FM website (Cleveland), Feb. 29

Help Wanted 
“VIDEO: Cops Seek Nicely Dressed Groper”–headline, WNBC-TV website (New York), March 1

News of the Tautological 
“Marijuana Arrests Down After Decriminalization”–Patch.com (Darien, Conn.), Feb. 29

News You Can Use 
“How To Kill Patent Trolls”–headline, Slate.com, Feb. 29

Bottom Stories of the Day

  • “Law School Aims for Faculty Diversity”–headline, Yale Daily News, March 1
  • “Andrew Sullivan Goes Over the Line in a Delusional Blog Post”–headline, PJMedia.com, Feb. 29
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